Wondering update.

Last week, I wrote about being afraid to try something new in this post. It was a way for me to hopefully bring in some extra money. For a little background, Hubz and I have gone through some rough spots over the past four years that have really done a job on our finances. I had major surgery on my liver and was out of work for a month. Hubz tried his hand at his own business that ultimately did not work out. And then, even though she is our greatest joy, we got further behind when we found out I was pregnant with Bean. We are still trying to dig ourselves out from this huge hole we found ourselves in.

So this opportunity came up and I seriously considered doing it for some extra cash. It wasn't anything huge at all. I was simply thinking of joining a popular direct selling company as a representative doing home parties.

Now for those that know me, you know that I'm not really a "people person". I'm not bubbly or effervescent. I don't have the demeanor I think you need in order to stand up in front of people and get them interested in the products enough to generate sales. That's just not me. I'm more of a people watcher than a people exciter. I knew this would be the hardest hurdle for me to get over.

So I did a lot of wondering and pondering. What finally was the sticking point with me was exactly how much of my time I would have to devote to this endeavor to get it started. I already work a full time job an hour away from our home. Basically the only time I get to spend with Bean during the week is a few hours in the evenings. If I were to start with this company, I would need to devote my weekends to traveling around giving home shows. Weekends are my Bean time.

I'm sure if I were successful I would eventually get to the place where I could reduce the amount of weekend time spent doing these parties, and ultimately, I might get to the point where my full time job wasn't needed any longer.

But at this time in my life, I've decided I want to be selfish. While there may be great rewards awaiting me if I were to work really hard at this opportunity, I feel that my greatest rewards are going to be found in the time I can spend with Bean.

Is that a cop out? On some levels, it might be. But she will only be this age for a short time. I figure that this opportunity isn't going any where. I might revisit it in a few years when Bean is a little older. Right now I want to be selfish and spend my weekends laughing with my daughter and making memories.