Sick again and gettin' dissed.

I am sick AGAIN.  Bean started getting sick on Saturday.  Well, she started sneezing a lot on Saturday and I happen to say to Hubz “Gee, she sure is sneezing quite a bit today.  I hope she’s not getting sick.”  A day late and a dollar short, I guess.  But it wasn’t enough for her to get sick, she had to bring me along for the ride.  This was my birthday weekend so I grounded her for getting me sick on my birthday.  How old am I?  Don’t make me ground you, too.

So because I’ve been feeling puny, I haven’t felt like talking to you all.  I do apologize and hope that you can forgive me.  Frankly, I’m tired of getting sick every time Bean does.  I guess I need to up our Vitamin C or something. 

Saturday Hubz, Bean, and I went to a Princess Diana exhibit.  I was/am a huge Princess Diana fan.  I have so many books, magazines, and various memorabilia about her.  Hubz’ thinks it’s crazy but that’s what I think about his 15 fishing poles, too.  To each his own. 

Bean made it halfway through the exhibit before beginning her meltdown.  To be fair, it was close to her nap time, she’s been bottle/best friend-free for almost two weeks, and she wasn’t allowed to run all over the place.  I would probably be grumpy, too.  I kept trying to tell her that she was gonna get to see a Princess dress.  She wasn’t really sold on the idea.
                                   
For some reason she has an aversion to her daddy.  I don’t know why.  They like to play together.  But when it is time for comforting, she’s a Mommy’s girl.  All I and the hundred other people around kept hearing was “Mommy, I want to hold you.”  Over and over and over.  Towards the end of the exhibit, I finally got her to fall asleep.  I was holding her when a woman came up to me and said “So, you finally got her down, huh?”. 

Was that a diss?  Was that a “why the heck did you bring a two-year old to something like this?”  Was that a “God, Woman!  Didn’t you bring any duct tape with you?”  Maybe she meant it in a “I know how you feel, girl” kinda way.  I don’t know.  But I was at an exhibit honoring a woman who tried to be an ambassador to millions of people so I decided in the sprit of Princess Diana to not go looney bin crazy on the woman.  I just smiled at her and shook my head.

Have you ever been on the receiving end of a comment that you didn’t quite know how to take?  Did you keep calm or did you go looney bin crazy?  

Operation Bye-Bye BaBa - Part III

And now, the conclusion of Update on Operation Bye-Bye BaBa.

So Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday were hard on Bean.  And I’ll admit, they were hard on me, too.

Friday morning when Bean and I were getting ready to go to Giggles’ house, I told Bean to grab a toy or doll, whatever she wanted to take with her to her nannies that day.  She started into the living room and then turned back to me and said, “But no BaBas.”

I stopped in my tracks and looked at her.  Her little face.  Those sweet, sweet eyes looking at me. 

I said to her, “No, honey, no BaBas.”

She said, “Cause I a big girl.”

THUD.  My heart fell out on the floor right there.  I stepped over it and grabbed her up in my arms.  I kissed her little face all over and hugged her close to me.  I sat on the couch holding her and just bawled my eyes out.

I said, “That’s right, baby.  You are a big girl now and you don’t need any BaBas.  You need to start drinking out of a cuppie like other big girls.”  I told her how big she was getting and that even though Mommy thinks of her as an itty, bitty baby, she isn’t really.  She is growing and learning so much.  I told her how proud we were of her and how much Mommy and Daddy loved her.  I told her I knew it was hard for her to learn to be without her BaBa and that she hadn’t done anything wrong, she just needed to move onto big girl cuppies. 

I went on and on and on.  She just looked up at me and giggled.  I cried because both she and I had realized that she isn’t a baby any more.  She realized it was time to do some big girl things and I realized it was time I let her. 

She still asks for a BaBa at night but there is no crying any more, hers or mine.  When we tell her no, she might pout or ask a couple more times but then she lets it go. 

Did we do the right thing?  Yeah, I think so.

Did it break my heart to do it?  Most definitely.  But I know that this is just the beginning to many hard parenting decisions we are going to have to make for Bean if we’re lucky. 

Now I guess we have to start working on Operation Hello Potty.  Ugh. 

Operation Bye-Bye BaBa - Part II

And now...the continuation of Operation Bye-Bye BaBa.

Having realized that switching bottle types on the Bean was not getting us any closer to BaBa independence, on Tuesday night I bit the bullet and we began our journey into the “BaBa No-Fly Zone”.

Once Bean got her bath and her PJs on, she started asking for her BaBa.  I gathered up all my courage and looked my toddler square in the eye and said “we don’t have any BaBas tonight, Puddin’.”  Gasp!  Shock!  Horror! (Insert screaming here.)

This is the moment my sweet, loving baby girl turned into Beanzilla. 

Crying ensued, toys flew, Mommy started to shake.  “BaBa!  BaBa!  BABA!!!!” 
“I WANT MY BABA!!!!”

The crying and begging continued for about 30 minutes and finally Bean crawled up in my lap and fell asleep.  I’m sure she dreamt of her BaBa all night. 

Wednesday night was much the same way with less time spent crying and begging.  Hey!  We might be getting somewhere here.

Thursday...well, evidently Bean had forgotten all about Tuesday and Wednesday nights because when she was told that there were no BaBas, she wigged out again and the crying lasted longer than it had the previous night. 

At this point, I started really beating myself up over this whole idea.  I knew the reasons for getting her off the bottle were sound.  I knew it would help her in the long run.  She would hopefully start to eat more and by eating more, she would increase her iron levels and gain some weight.  I knew this.

But I started thinking that I had kicked off behavior that would cause Bean many counseling sessions later on in life.  “I’m all screwed up because my mom took away the only thing that ever gave me any comfort when I was 2.”  I can hear it all now.  The BaBa is really her only security item.  It’s the only thing she consistently asks for.  And I’m not easing her into saying good bye.  I’m just snatching it away from her.  I started to think I was doing it the wrong way, that I should have just let her grow out of it.  And of course the old thought I had had before crept in.  The BaBa is the last link (other than diapers and I can’t even begin to wrap my mind around potty training right now), but it’s the last link in Bean being a baby. 

I know all kids grow up.  That’s their job and hopefully they do it well.  But I wanted a baby for so long and it seems as though babyhood came and went so very fast.  And yes, I do understand that all of these feelings are mine and not really helping my child in any way.  That doesn’t change the fact that they are very real feelings and that they definitely did a number of my confidence and emotional state last week.  I beat myself up over this whole situation. 

But I felt that she and I had come so far that I would just be doing more harm if I gave up and gave her back the bottle.  I just kept telling myself to be still and wait to see what happened next. 

And I’ll tell you what did happen next...TOMORROW!!!!  Stay tuned.  (Again.)

Update on Operation Bye-Bye BaBa

I've mentioned Operation Bye-Bye BaBa here and here.  I'm back today with an update.

Brief recap - "BaBa" is Bean's baby bottle and her bestie.  She can not take a nap, go to bed, or even walk around the house without BaBa.  It is her security item.

We tried in December to break up Bean and BaBa.  That failed miserably.  She couldn't stop crying.  I couldn't stop crying.  Hubz caved and gave it back to her.

In January, after her check up, she was only 21 pounds and anemic/borderline anemic.  Bean always picked at her food, preferring instead to drink from her bottle.  Food was fun, but BaBa was best!  I knew that probably the best way to get some weight on her and to try and up her iron levels was to get her off the bottle.

So my next new idea was to give her a bottle that was shaped differently than the ones she's always used.  I thought maybe this would cause her to lose interest since it didn't feel the same.  So last Monday night, I handed over the new bottle when Bean started asking for BaBa after her bath and the placement of the PJs.

She looked at this new fangled contraption and said "No!  BaBa!!!"  I explained to her that this was her new BaBa and that the old ones were in the dishwasher getting a bath.  If she wanted a BaBa, then this was what she was gonna use.  Then the crying started.  Luckily, it was just Bean performing that night.  I made myself stay calm.  I kept telling myself "There's no crying in Operation Bye-Bye BaBa!"

The crying continued for an hour until I finally asked Bean what would make her feel better.  I figured she would say "Duh, dummy!" but she said "T.B."  That's "t.v." to you toddler-speak rookies out there.

So I let her lead me in to the living room and she and I laid down on the couch.  She handed me the remote and we started watching ice dancing.  Within ten minutes, Bean was asleep with tears drying on her little cheeks.  At first, she fell asleep with the new bottle next to her.  After I checked on her again later, she had made friends with the new one, and it had made its way to her mouth.  She woke up about 3 a.m. and when I checked on her, she asked for BaBa.  I handed her the new one and she spent the next five minutes crying some more but finally went back to sleep.

Since she did make friends with the new bottle, I knew that this plan wasn't going to work.  She was just gonna start wanting the new type bottle all the time.  I only bought one.  I didn't want to spend more money on bottles.  So the next night...



Tune in tomorrow for the rest of the story.

She makes me cry.

Dear Bean,

You make me cry every day.  Yeah, I think I’ve cried in some fashion every single day since you were born. 

Sometimes I cry because I think you love the nannies more than me.  Sometimes I cry because you are away from me.  Sometimes I cry because I’m afraid I’m not doing the best job I can by you.  Lately I’ve cried because you are growing up so very fast.  You change every day.  Most of the time, it’s for the better.  Those days you sneak in a tantrum, well, those aren’t good crying days.

But most of the time I cry because you are my dream come true, and I am so very thankful that you are in our lives.  (Yep, I’m crying again.) 

I'm sure there will be days that you make me cry that aren't so good.  But remember this...I am thankful that I have you in my life to cry over. 

Love,
Mommy

Wordless Wednesday - Two Bears and a Bean

Ridin' the coupon trains

I have a love/hate relationship with coupons.  I love to get the Sunday paper, find the coupon inserts and start clipping.  I have had some really productive weeks where I will write up a menu plan, cross reference it to the grocery store ads, make my grocery list and gather my coupons.  I've even made it to the store with the list and the coupons at the same time.  Those are some of my proudest moments of myself when the whole plan comes together, you know?

But then my real, unorganized self sneaks back in and I get so far as to clip the coupons.  Then they usually lie around until they expire.  I look at all of them and think "what a waste".  Recently, after going through a coupon insert and taking out what I could use, I looked at what was left and thought again "what a waste".  I decided then to see if I could find some people interested in starting a coupon train with me.  So The Pink Bean Coupon Train was born. (That's mighty original, ain't it?)

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What is a coupon train you ask?  Let me 'splain.  A coupon train is basically a coupon swap group.  A rider receives an address of the person they will send coupons to each week.  When their person receives the coupons in the mail, they take out what they can use and then refill the envelope with the same number of coupons that they removed.  The coupons are then sent around for everyone on the route to pick through.  This is a great way to share the savings with others instead of tossing out all those unused coupons.

We are currently looking for dedicated people that are interested in joining our coupon train.  The time commitment is one month.  You would need to be able to send out an envelope each Monday to your person.  At this time the minimum number of coupons is 40 per envelope.  You can add more if you’d like but there would need to be a minimum of 40 coupons.  The coupons have to be ones you find in circulars or magazines.  No self-printed ones because every store has a different policy on those nd we wouldn’t want someone to be stuck with an entire batch of coupons that they couldn’t use.  The coupons would need to be good for at least two weeks out and they should be from a wide range of items, not all health and beauty or all baby items as an example.

If you are interested in joining this coupon train and if you can absolutely commit to send out an envelope a week for monthly time commitments, then please join our group.  I’ve created a Yahoo group so that people can get more information about the train, add their coupon wishlist and have a place to communicate with the group.  I would like for all members to join the group and post each time you mail out and each time you receive envelopes.

If you have any questions about the whole coupon train thing, please leave a comment below or feel free to email me.  I really hope we can find more riders to share savings and hopefully make friends while saving.

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