Love Letters to My Daughter - Perfect

Dear Bean,

I just wanted to tell you one thing.

I think you’re perfect.

First, I know all mommies are supposed to think their babies are perfect. It’s in our contracts. But I really think you are perfect.

Second, don’t misunderstand me...I KNOW you’re not perfect. No one is. I am reminded of this when the house gets quiet and I start to wonder where you have hidden yourself. I call out your name and ask “what cha doing, baby?”. You call back and say “I not doin’ nuthin’.” I figure I’m in trouble then. I know I’ve got trouble on my hands when I finally find you squirreled away behind your toy bin and discover that you’ve been trying to paint your own toenails. Your whole left foot is blue from the blue nail polish we just bought. Funny though because there isn’t any blue toe nail polish on any of your toe nails, just your foot. And my carpet.

I see all of this and realize the extra work that is in front of me right then to clean up you and the floor and I know it’s not perfect.

But I still think you are perfect.

You see, there is a popular song out now from one of my favorite singers, Pink. Yes, I like her name but I really like her voice and I really, really like that she knows who she is and is satisfied with herself.

There is a part of the song that goes

Pretty, please please

Don’t you ever, ever feel

Like your less than

Less than perfect

Pretty, pretty please

If you ever, ever feel

Like you’re nothing

You are perfect to me

(We’ll use the edited lyrics since you’ve already learned all the bad words you need to from Daddy and the Black Eyed Peas.)

I know that in this world, the world that you will soon face (too soon for my liking) that you will have days that you will be bullied. And there will be days when you are the bully.

I just pray that on the days you are bullied that you remember you are worth more than someone else’s cheap words. You are worth so much more than someone else’s need to make themselves feel better and more “normal”. Don’t buy into what they are telling you. They know nothing.

And I also pray that on the days you find yourself being a bully to someone else, please, please remember that the person you are trying to belittle is someone else’s perfect child, too. That person is worth more than your need to fit in.

Just always try to remember that you are perfect - to me, and to Daddy, and to so many other people that love you. Mainly, mostly, to me. Mommy will always think you are perfect - even when she knows you’re not.

You are the answer to my prayers. So, so many prayers. And that makes you priceless. And perfect to me.

She makes me cry.

Dear Bean,

You make me cry every day.  Yeah, I think I’ve cried in some fashion every single day since you were born. 

Sometimes I cry because I think you love the nannies more than me.  Sometimes I cry because you are away from me.  Sometimes I cry because I’m afraid I’m not doing the best job I can by you.  Lately I’ve cried because you are growing up so very fast.  You change every day.  Most of the time, it’s for the better.  Those days you sneak in a tantrum, well, those aren’t good crying days.

But most of the time I cry because you are my dream come true, and I am so very thankful that you are in our lives.  (Yep, I’m crying again.) 

I'm sure there will be days that you make me cry that aren't so good.  But remember this...I am thankful that I have you in my life to cry over. 

Love,
Mommy